Blackbear

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This Message Is Reprinted Under The Fair Use
Doctrine Of International Copyright Law:
_http://www4.law.cornell.edu/uscode/17/107.html_
(http://www4.law.cornell.edu/uscode/17/107.html)
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FROM: THE LANDOVER BAPTIST CHURCH WEBSITE - A TRUE CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIVE ON
LOCAL, NATIONAL & WORLD NEWS!
_http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news1105/firstterrorists.html_
(http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news1...errorists.html)
American Injuns:
The First Terrorists
Thanksgiving: Honoring Our First Fallen
Long before America was attacked by Muslamiacs on September 11, 2001,
Baptists recall a time when our dear, Godly ancestors also endured brutal slaughter
by terrorist vermin on this very same land. You see, when God sent his
followers to claim America as the new Canaan, He neglected to mention it would be
filled with millions of lazy Injuns. These savage "squatters," as we've come
to call them here at Landover Baptist Church, then had the unmitigated
audacity to defy the kindly eviction notices served upon them by God's blue-eyed
chosen people. Instead, they terrorized our peaceful ancestors, raping their
livestock and engaging in nefarious espionage to steal the smallpox virus for
their own selfish purposes.
Nevertheless, our Christian ancestors persevered. And it is for this reason
that each November we observe "Thanksgiving" - as a time to "thank" God for
"giving" America to people who deserved it much more than _the first
terrorists_ (http://www.unitednativeamerica.com/press/cox.html) : the Injuns.
Injuns and Arabs: Comparing the Roots of Terror
One doesn't have to look too hard to see how similar the indigenous
terrorists our American ancestors righteously exterminated are to the foul Arabiac
terrorists our Christian nation is eliminating today. Both are dark completed -
one red-butted, one negro-lite - and are cursed with jet black hair. Both
terrorists are nomadic in nature, and prefer fighting in sweltering, arid
places - clear evidence of their alliance with demons, who are accustomed to the
heat of hellfire. Both are tent dwellers (one prefers a tee-pee made of deer
skin and human scalps, the other a lean-too made of shaved human groin hair and
goat feces. Both terrorists are uneducated, uncivilized, and speak in
elaborate gibberish languages. Both resent the progress God's chosen people (True
ChristiansTM) have made in the world, and direct their jealous hatred toward
the one True ReligionTM, Christianity. Both types of terrorists dress in rags
and conceal their filthy hair beneath elaborate terrorist doo-rags: Injuns make
theirs with feathers, while Muslims spin toilet paper cocoons called "turbans
"). Both rejoice in the slaughter of American citizens.
An End to the First War on Terror
Whether it was with bottoms full of buckshot or bottles drained of booze, the
debate still rages as to how our ancestors defeated these first Injun
terrorists. We can only thank God that they were defeated, and America is a better
country because of it. It should harden our resolve in our faith that our
Godly President Bush can and WILL defeat the terrorists of today! Landover
Baptist Church members are reminded during this time of Thanksgiving that while
the cease-fire with Injuns is still technically in effect, that is no reason
to EVER forego the offerings of our Godly Bingo parlors in favor of any
sickening, sinful Injun casino.
Our pastors encourage you to use this Christian holiday time to be thankful
for the blood-soaked efforts our forefathers made on your behalf in fighting
America's first terrorists so that you can pass a lovely Thanksgiving
afternoon with your family, enjoying the pleasures of Butterball turkeys and
televised professional football.
For more information on Landover Baptist's ongoing struggle with local Injuns
in Freehold County, Iowa, _click here._
(http://www.landoverbaptist.org/subje...nksgiving.html)

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Don't worry that it's not good enough for anyone else to hear... just sing, sing a song.

Blackbear

What a crock huh????!!! That just made me mad as hell! Till I found out it was from a satire site ROFLMAO!

__________________
Don't worry that it's not good enough for anyone else to hear... just sing, sing a song.

White Powwow Dancer

Hi
Where did you get the info? Just a bunch of trash someone wrote about the Natives of this land. >:(

__________________
Asema Is Sacred
Traditional Use, Not Misuse
Wakan Tanka please have compassion on me.
OK Niji we are running a train with red over yellow at this powwow.

Blackbear

let me repeat and expound on that... satire site... pokes fun at things.. big joke.

__________________
Don't worry that it's not good enough for anyone else to hear... just sing, sing a song.

DancingGoat

This site is not meant to be taken literally.

This is a common problem for the satirically impaired.

If you go to the bottom of the page and click on "about us", they tell you that
“The Landover Baptist Church is a complete work of fiction. It is a satire/parody.”

Parody: A literary or artistic work that imitates the characteristic style of an author or a work for comic effect or ridicule. See Synonyms at caricature.

Satire:
1.
a. A literary work in which human vice or folly is attacked through irony, derision, or wit.
b. The branch of literature constituting such works. See Synonyms at caricature.
2. Irony, sarcasm, or caustic wit used to attack or expose folly, vice, or stupidity.
Sometimes it helps if you actually take time to read the disclaimer.
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/tos.html

Look at the other articles on the site – they are clearly parody:

Bible based sexuality: Is Breast Feeding a Gateway Sin?
Tampons: Satan’s Little Cotton Fingers,
Don’t Get Caught on the Toilet When Jesus Comes Back,
Speak in Tongues in 5 Days or your Money Back,
Book Burning Safety Tips,
Jimmy Carter’s Habitat for Heathens etc.

If you’re still not getting it
Try reading "Why Would Someone Create An Elaborate Website Just to Make Fun of Fundamentalist Christians"
http://www.bettybowers.com/whynot.html


If you still don’t understand what a parody site is, you should ask your parents to help you use the computer next time. ;)


Dancing Goat

crazywolf

Boozhoo niji,

I got a letter from a friend with this chain letter, and a link to the site. At first I thought it was satire, then visited the site. I have never seen so much work put into BS. I thought the site was legit until I followed the link supplied by DAncing Goat. I find it sad to think that anyone would consider us as being terrorists, whether its a joke or not, and the whole site is just in poor taste.

I had to study satire and parody in English in college, and I know what they are, but I dont exactly understand them. Its like you hide something with a message, and you dont know if its true or not. I encounter a lot of these kinds of things, people joking with me, and its getting to be where you dont know if you can take someone seriously or not.

I remember a post in a message board somewhere a long time ago. It told of an elder that used few words, not because they were unwise, but because their words are valuable and didnot want to waste them. If we all held that belief, there would be fewer misunderstandings, and less stress in our lives. Sure it might seem more boring, but I dont think we should dispose of all comedy. Things can be funny and interesting without being misleading.

Derek

Blackbear

You did'nt enjoy the "What Would Jesus Do" thong at the bottom of the page Crazywolf? ROFLMAO!!! I'm not sure how it can be misleading at the website, in an email yes, but then I would still laugh at anyone who actually believed that load and wrote it as fact.

__________________
Don't worry that it's not good enough for anyone else to hear... just sing, sing a song.

andre

I really liked alot of the stuff in there (like the TM and the blue-eyed shtuff), but I can see Crazywolf's view on this. For the average American this would be totally misleading and in fact they may start quoting it as fact. Satire is an art form and it would not be the first time if I sat down and wrote a satirical letter to a professor (which I am really tempted to do right now). Unfortunately some people just don't get it, and like Crazywolf said, that's when we run into trouble.

wendyofwinter

Always getting PICKED ON by smaller, more primitive nations.... Always minding their own business.... Never stepping on anyone's toes.... Never taking anything that doesn't belong to them.... Never provoking wrath and ire.... Never doing ANYTHING wrong....!!!


Oh puh-LEEEEASE!


(Stealing smallpox virus.... that's too much)


I ran into this sort of thing once over the highly inflammatory subject of Harry Potter. Some minister sent out an article from the satire paper The Onion to his whole congregation without ever checking his sources, and the people of his church went absolutely berserk.

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wyo_rose

Satire or not. I STILL DON"T LIKE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Don't take life so seriously!
It's not permanent.

wareagle

its strait up not cool to joke about us native as terrorist, i could see crazy wolfs veiw and id say to some thing like that is bull S***. but i dont get hurt by some one elses words and i make them into a fool, a coward for saying that and make them look bad, so that all and such.

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whazz up!