04-24-2007, 04:48 PM
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#1 (permalink) |
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little bird
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Brea, CA
Posts: 1,533
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Why, why, why
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they already know you don't have enough money? Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check with their finger when you say the paint is wet? Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle? Why does the government require that only sterilized needles be used for death by lethal injection? Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him? Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"? If people evolved from apes, did some apes choose not to evolve? Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance? Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the top end on your first try? How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures? When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?" Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over? In Winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in the Summer, when we complained about it being to hot? How come you never hear father-in-law jokes? And my FAVORITE...... Statistics on sanity show that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then... it's you
__________________
 "Riches from the heart can not be stolen."
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04-27-2007, 01:00 PM
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#2 (permalink) | |
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*shhh* . . im thinking
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: beating the crap out of the other stick figure
Posts: 3,811
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Quote:
#1 drives me crazy. In the summer flies get in there, my cat is always running into the window or jumping at it. #2-My lil' girl always pushes her cup off the table. The first few times i'd try to catch it, knocking over my drink. Now I just let it spill. #3-I'm a weeny when it gets cold. I'm like that guy in the movie 'cool runnings', i layer. #4-GUILTY 
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 Last edited by Mud_Woman; 04-27-2007 at 01:02 PM. |
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04-27-2007, 03:14 PM
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#4 (permalink) | |
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little bird
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Brea, CA
Posts: 1,533
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Quote:
__________________
"Riches from the heart can not be stolen."
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05-04-2007, 03:21 PM
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#5 (permalink) | ||
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Dances with Lead Foot
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: She ga goy nak
Posts: 601
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Quote:
 Quote:
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Something exists. |
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