Singing Otter

hehehe I thought this was kinda funny

Pet Rules to be posted Very Low on the refrigerator door - preferably at nose-height.

Dear Dogs and Cats,

The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by Nascar and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king size bed. I'am sorry about that. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort, Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep, it is not necessary to sleep perpenicular to each other stretched out to the fillest extent
possible. I also know that sticking tails strait out and having tongues out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sheer sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom, if by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open, I must exit through the same door I entered, also I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt, I cannot stress this enough!


To all non-pet owners who visit and like to complain about our pets.

1. They live here, you don't
2. If you don't want there hair on your cloths, stay off the furniture. (thats why they call it "fur"niture)
3. I like my pets alot better than I like most people.
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car.
6. Don't hang out with drug using friends.
7. Don't smoke or drink.
8. Don't have to buy the latset fashions.
9. Don't want to wear your cloths
10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and you can sell the children if they get pregnant.

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Joe's Dad

Rule #11...JD is the eighth dog in his house!!!

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